When he woke the next morning, Kylie was sleeping soundly, curled up mostly
on top of him. She’d woken him several times, caught in the grip of
nightmares, and even though she’d quickly calmed down at the sound of his
voice, he hated to disturb her.
Unfortunately, he had no choice. His bladder was making itself known with
increasing urgency, and he _had_ to get up. It wasn’t easy, as every time
he tried to slip out from under her she’d grab on more tightly, until it
was actually uncomfortable.
Finally, he gave up. “Kylie, love, I need to get up.”
“Mmm?”
“I need to get up. Please?” He tried to work her fingers loose.
She blinked sleepily. “You’re leaving?” she asked, her voice shaking.
“No,” Jason said, shaking his head. “But your knee is pressing on my
bladder.”
“Oh,” she said, relaxing again, and sighing. “Sorry.” She bit her lip, then
rolled to the side, her fingers trailing over his chest as she slid down
beside him.
“You feel nice,” he said, stroking her cheek. “I’m going to go to the
bathroom, then go talk to…” He stopped. What should he call the Rourkes?
“Your folks,” he finally decided on. “You don’t have to get up yet; you can
go on back to sleep.”
Kylie frowned. “You’ll come back? Promise you won’t leave me?”
He nodded. “I’ll be right in the other room. I’m not leaving.”
“Okay, then,” she said, letting him go reluctantly and snuggling down under
the blanket.
Jason slid out of the bed and made a quick detour to the bathroom before
sliding on his shorts and making his way out to the kitchen, where the
Rourkes were sitting quietly at the table, drinking coffee.
“Is there another cup?” Jason asked, fighting back a yawn.
“In the cabinet over the stove,” John said. “Is she asleep still?”
Jason nodded. “Mostly,” he said, rummaging in the cabinet for a cup. “She
woke up a bit when I got out of bed, but when I promised her I wasn’t
leaving she went back to sleep.” He added sugar to his coffee and sat down
at the table as John ran a hand through his hair and frowned.
“I get the feeling she didn’t sleep much night before last,” Jason added
after taking a swallow of his coffee. “Aside from the nightmares, she slept
like a log.”
John sighed, and Mandy reached over and squeezed his hand. “I’m not sure
what to do now,” he said. “There’s the police stuff… I can handle most of
that, and she may not even be needed to testify directly, if we can get a
psychiatrist to say that it would harm her.”
Jason nodded. “I don’t think she _could_, not in front of him,” he said.
“Maybe videotaped. But… I think her statement and his journal ought to do
it, right? I mean, I don’t think he can afford much of a lawyer, can he?”
He stopped as a thought hit him. “You know, once he’s convicted, y’all
ought to sue him in her name. Get every penny he has left, just to finish
it.”
“I just want him out of the picture,” John said. “Gone. All of this over
with so she doesn’t have to deal with it anymore. But until it is… she’s
going to need some help. Some professional help, someone who knows how to
deal with this sort of thing. And I’m not sure what to do about school. My
instinct is to pull her out, put her in a private school or homeschool,
but….”
“But,” Mandy interrupted, “I honestly think that would do more harm than
good.”
John’s face was torn with indecision, and it was clear to Jason that they’d
argued over this subject all night.
“I think so too,” Jason said, slowly. “She’s terrified that people are
going to despise her when they find out, and pulling her out would just
make her think she was right.” He stared down at his coffee before lifting
it and taking a sip. “I told her I thought she shouldn’t try to hide it. If
she does, people like that bitch Sherry will try to use it against her. If
she stands up, unashamed, and says ‘Yes, this happened to me, and it wasn’t
my fault,’ they won’t have that. And it might help someone else.”
Mandy nodded. “If she keeps hiding, she’ll never stop being afraid.
But….” She looked over at John.
“But,” John said softly, “coming out of hiding might be too much for her.
If it goes badly, she might not can handle it. It might ruin any chance she
has of having a normal life.”
Jason looked at them. “I think she’s stronger than that,” he said finally.
“And like I told her last night, if it gets to be too much, she can lean on
me. I’ll help her.”
John frowned. “That worries me too, frankly. I…. You’re a good kid,
Jason. Your dad has every right to be proud as hell of you, and I can’t
even tell you how grateful I am for what you did. But. You’re seventeen.
She’s sixteen. She’s obviously never had anyone she could trust, and you’re
not known for taking relationships seriously. I don’t mean to be insulting,
I’m just putting my concern on the table.”
Jason grimaced. “Look, Mr. Rourke, I understand. But I don’t think you
understand that… the reason I never took relationships seriously is
because they _weren’t_ relationships. They were….” He hesitated. “The
best word I can think of is ‘fuckbuddies’.” He blushed and looked at Mandy.
“Sorry, Mrs. Rourke, but it fits the best.”
He stood and started pacing. “Could I have had a girlfriend? Yeah. I’m not
trying to brag, but I’m not going to pretend I don’t know I could have had
pretty much any girl I wanted. But I _didn’t_ want. Not ’til I met Kylie.”
He met John’s eyes. “I don’t understand this! I thought love at first sight
was a myth, but… but…. I’m not like those girls who fall ‘in love’
every week with at different guy. I don’t have to convince myself I love
someone just because I want to have sex with them, or because I care for
them. I can do that with friends.”
He threw his hands up over his head. “I don’t understand what makes Kylie
different, but she is. I don’t _want_ to just be her friend. I want–” He
stopped mid-sentence and shook his head. Walking slowly back to his chair,
he sat down. “I’m not going to hurt her,” he said, quietly. “She’s _not_
just another fuckbuddy.”
“It’s not easy, I know,” Mandy said, equally quietly. “Caring for someone
else and knowing that there are things you _can’t_ protect them from.
Having to face the fact that the decisions you make don’t affect just you
anymore. And this is going to be hard for you, too. Maybe the hardest thing
you’ve ever done. If there’s any doubt, any doubt at all in your heart,
that it will be worth it, then _now_ is the time to face it. Now, before
she turns to you for something you might not be able to give her.”
Jason took a drink of his coffee, his hands shaking. He set it carefully
back down on the table, and looked at her. “That’s what scares me,” he
said. “There’s not. Shouldn’t there be?”
Mandy smiled at him. “No, there shouldn’t be, but there usually is.”
“I don’t feel any.”
“_Good_,” Mandy said, reaching out and patting his hand. “You shouldn’t be
scared of miracles, sweetheart, just be grateful they exist.” She finished
her coffee and stood up. “Unfortunately, we have to go to work. There are
questions we’ll have to answer, and paperwork to fill out, and things to
take care of. You two can stay here today, though I’m leaving my car if you
need it. You can also call the school for _any_ reason. Don’t hesitate to
do so if you need us.”
John looked more than a little rebellious, as if he wanted to stay there,
but sighed and nodded. “Anything,” he said, before finishing his coffee and
standing.
“Okay,” Jason said, looking up at them. “I’ll take care of her, I promise.”
John just looked at him for a long moment, then turned and left the room.
“It’s hard for him,” Mandy said. “He doesn’t want to trust anyone else with
her right now.”
“I understand,” Jason said. “And I _will_ take care of her.”
“Good,” she said. She favored him with a small smile, before following her
husband out of the house.